The Blah-ber Blog

Sometimes saying 'no' should be the norm

2011-12-08T10:05:00.001+05:30

“According to the United Nation'sDepartment of Public Information, violence against women (VAW) is a major causeof death and disability for women between the ages of 15 to 44 years across theworld. At least one out of every three women is likely to be beaten, coercedinto sex or otherwise abused in her lifetime. Worldwide, one in five women willbecome a victim of rape or attempted rape in her lifetime. More than 80 percent of trafficking victims are women.”

Honestly, I don’t think we needany special data from the United Nations to make us aware that violence againstwomen is a major issue that definitely calls for attention. It is prettysimilar to how we don’t require statistics to tell us that India has a lot ofpoor people. I think the situation is one where we’re even aware of the problembut don’t take any steps to do away with the same. Violence of any sort,against any one can be universally thought to not be on side of ‘good things Ishould do in my life’. Unless of course, there is some weird kink - but thoseare exceptions.

A well known gender-studiesscholar, Hanna Papanek, in ‘To each less than she needs, from each more thanshe can : allocations, entitlements, and value’ has addressed ideas aboutsocially and culturally formed ‘entitlements’ to resource shares and ideasabout socialization for inequality. This may seem like a bit of a deviation,but stay on.

Gender inequalities do exist. Butwhat keeps them perpetuated? According to Hanna Papanek, resource allocationwithin families or kinship groups (extended families) are closely linked to thepower and authority relations even if it may not be obvious all the time. Anyguesses to who decides how much in patriarchal set-ups? Obviously, the males.

Other important concepts that shebrings up is ‘socialization for inequality’ and ‘compulsory emotions’.Socialization is the process by which an individual is taught the norms or howhe/she is supposed to behave in society. The primary agents for this is ofcourse, one’s family. ‘Socialization for inequality’ refers to the way genderdifferences are learned (and taught) in a family or a group. ‘Compulsoryemotions’ refer to how one is supposed to feel toward specific other in asituation or even about themselves. These may be important in socializing womenin accepting inequalities. One of the things that this implies is that womenshould expect poor treatment, pain and any other form of subordination.

Most societies are patriarchal intheir authority structure. Specially the one I live in, the Indian society.Patriarchy is that form of authority structure where only male members havesignificant authority or power (which they exercise mostly according to whimsand fancies). Patriarchy inherently entails female subordination.

Let’s say I don’t mind granting them this brilliant positionin the power equation. Since they do have an upper hand in the power-position,they do get to say no. In fact, since they would be the ones formulating rules,they have to say no. Of course, at the other end, it is they who tend toinflict violence on women. But what we must remember is that violence againstwomen is not a norm. There are a lot of men who could probably neverthink of inflicting such violence. But here, it’s not the thought that counts.Absence of action seems to be striking. Women, feminists (mostly women) aretrying to do their job, voicing their concerns. But shouldn’t the men who areagainst such behavior voice their opinions too? If men won’t listen to women,maybe they would be willing to listen to fellow men?

Empowering women with education, financial independence etc.is all good. But men need empowerment through a particular education, as well.They need to know that it is not okay. And they also need their children toknow that it is not okay. As a parent, they can step in at the socialisationprocess and just teach them that violence isn’t a done thing. Little girls needto stop learning to accept that gender-based discrimination and violence hasbeen a part of society too long, so nothing can change today. Of course, to saythat there will be no violence against women someday is a utopian thought. Butany minor change is a good change. Let’s aim to stop perpetuating that beliefsystem that violence against women is okay.

If they need role models, I suggest theylook up Indian history pre-Independence. Raja Ram Mohan Roy, Gandhi, M.G.Ranade, Jyotiba Phule are some names.

This Blog is part of the Men Say No Blogathon, encouraging men to take up action against the violence faced by women.
More entries to the Blogathon can be read at www.mustbol.in/blogathon. Join further conversation on facebook.com/delhiyouth & twitter.com/mustbol

Waiting On The World To Change

2011-11-26T17:39:00.001+05:30

Exactly two years ago, I decided to suck it up and start writing a personal blog. So, happy birthday blahberandthelike :)

Exactly three years ago, however, India faced the first of what were the most torturous four days that I can think of, in my lifetime. 26/11. I can’t even call it a terrorist attack because it was more than just one attack. And every moment that you felt it would end, it just went on for longer.

26/11/2009 marked one year since the attack. I remember sitting at home, alone the entire day. I was watching the news. And the tears never stopped. Feeling helpless, I wanted to do something. I wanted to say something. But as a 16 year old girl, I really didn’t have options. Except to may be study really really hard and someday work within the system and impact change. That day, it felt like too long a wait. All I could think of was to write. To write how I felt and in some way, let some people know that I probably felt the same way as them.

Cynics possibly view candle light vigils/marches and stuff like writing and reading about such things a very superficial effort. Perhaps, equal to a non effort. Because you may get the candle sales up and you may show that you feel a certain way (like a lot of others do too) and that places like India Gate are an apt background to that picture but you are not effecting change. It’s a concrete representation but it’s not a concrete effort leading somewhere. Because you can read as many books, articles, etc. and write wherever and whatever you feel but it’s close to inaction. It’s all symbolic. Which isn’t bad but you need to back it up with action. I’ll agree, I am a partial cynic but then I am a partial romantic too.

It’s not like I think my writing on a blog, which isn’t even read by many people to begin with, will help bring a change. But I believe symbolic things like celebrating or commemorating an anniversary of a good or bad event is a step. A lot of people treat birthdays or anniversaries of other things like just another day and wonder why some people make a huge deal out of it to begin with. I respect their opinion. But for me, I'll tell you why they're important. We've enough reasons to not celebrate or commemorate things in life or be happy about certain things [I am not suggesting we need to be happy about what happened 3 years ago, but anniversaries in general, for instance, my blog turning two]. You and I both know we come across more bad news than good ones every day. It's easier to see the negatives too. But what I feel is that, every year, be it your birthday or a significant event that doesn't bring back good memories, celebrate it or respect that it happened and take what you can from it. Because when it comes to marking events like 26/11, you acknowledge that it happened and pledge that on your part, you don't want to see another one. You make sure that the people who lost their lives and the reasons for which they did, haven't been forgotten.

In the last three years, there hasn’t been significant progress. Political will sure seems to be standing, not just in the way but also, still. And forget terrorism and non-state actors from other countries, India has seen State actors behave in an anti-state manner. The garbage from within the country is honestly overwhelming. ‘Scams’ - possibly the most used word in headlines over the last year.

In class 11, during a History class - actually, this was right after 26/11. That year, we had a lot of communal disturbance in Orissa - civil unrest, riots against the Christians in Kandhamal. During that History class, we discussed priorities. Do we first clean up the mess within the country caused by our citizens or do we make India safe from outsiders? What if you make India impregnable and it takes such a long time to get there that you realise you no longer have one India but Indias? At another level, by the time you work on getting your act as a country together, outsiders and really evil people treat it as their holiday home? Of course, solutions to these can’t possibly be reached at in a classroom discussion. But maybe roots for a better/different future could be formed in classrooms. And maybe, generation by generation, we get our scene as a country sorted while the government with a suitable (not for them but for India) political will works within the international framework.

This is an idealist proposition. It’s like this stupid, romantic desire I had, of becoming a teacher of History in school. Have you ever wondered if a lot of children didn’t like History because their teachers taught it in a boring way? So my plan was to become a History teacher and probably teach middle-school history and maybe some of them will go on to like it and will probably pursue it or a humanities course later. And maybe we’ll have relatively more children opting for humanities than now...

Borrowing lyrics from John Mayer :

Now we see everything that's going wrong
With the world and those who lead it
We just feel like we don't have the means
To rise above and beat it

So we keep waiting
Waiting on the world to change

It's hard to beat the system
When we're standing at a distance
So we keep waiting
Waiting on the world to change

Appdiye Kolaveri!

2011-11-22T21:23:00.001+05:30

India's current population is about 1.7 Billion.
Number of hits on the YouTube video of 'Why This Kolaveri Di?' is about 1.4 Million right now.
Statistically speaking, 1 in 1000 Indians have heard 'this-u soup song-u'. And that's just a rough guesstimate!
Oh and it's just about been a week since it was released on YouTube [16th November, 2011]

Kolaveri in Tamil means something like furious enough to kill. Well, the song does seem to have the fury to kill records!

There's some magic about this song that makes it-u stuck-u in your-u head-u. And also, evidently, makes-u you start writing-u/talking-u like-u that-u.

Tonight, it's become the first Tamil song-u to make it to radio stations across-u the country. \m/

I am addicted majorly to this song penned by Dhanush [the actor who has sung this song which is from his upcoming movie '3' and is directed by his wife Aishwarya who is Rajni Saar's daat-er. TrustMeToTryFittingInRhombaTooMuchInformationInASentence] and the music composer is a 21 year old from Madras. My cousin tells me that he is part of this band called ZINX and that they performed at her college last year. +1 to Anirudh Ravichandar who probably thinks I am a stalker-ish character because I found his profile and messaged him only to see that, about two hours after that, it had become a 'like' page! Way to go, though! And bad timing y'all - we have exams going on.

There are these two itching thoughts in my mind though. Every time I listen to it or see it on my feed-u, these thoughts make their way back-u :
1) This viral song is catchy not just because of the tune or the lyrics but may be in part of how funny the lyrics are because of the so-called Tamil/South-Indian accent when we speak in English. I won't disagree with the fact that Indians from different parts of the country have a certain accent when they speak in English. I probably speak with a Tamil-Punjabi mixed accent. And Tamilians (or even Malayalis, Kannadigas or Telugu folk) have the tendency to speak with a -u and that can get a lot of laughs. But I just don't want this accent deal to be generalized and if some of us don't speak with the -u - it doesn't make it a huge miracle. It's the same way when, back in Chandigarh, my mother met our Punjabi neighbors (this is ... 5 houses/flats ago) for the first time and they went, "Hain? Aap Madrasan kaise ho sakte ho? Woh toh kaale hote hai!"
2) This song isn't technically Tamil. But what the hell! Kolaveri is a Tamil word, so it's all super, mama.

Can't wait-u for-u more-u records!

Beeswe Saal Mein Prasthaan

2011-11-15T17:56:00.001+05:30

I turned 19 years old this Sunday. 13th November, that is.
And as I step into the 20th year of my existence, I have a few things on my agenda.

To start blogging frequently. I don't know why I am sub-consciously pulling off an Aamir Khan. [Background Story : Aamir Khan inevitably produces/directs/acts in like, only one movie in an entire year unlike most of his contemporaries. He personifies "quality not quantity". While I seem to be on the same to road of personification, I think I need to speed up my act. A birthday wish from Malvika, a really awesome person [http://ajustifiedrandomness.blogspot.com/] and friend had the words : I love your blog, though it is prettttyyy much dead now.]
I did a bit of blogging for the Delhi Photo Festival which was held in October. I don't know if I did an okay/good/bad job but I sure learnt a lot. Here on my blog, I write without a deadline and I end up writing anything and everything that I think of and most of the time, I ask you to go read my blog. At the Festival's blog, people unknown to me and possibly from a different world altogether were reading what I wrote! Which was a brilliantly scary thought. Coming to the point : I got a stipend. My first pay-cheque. Don't know whether or not I deserve it but a super-awesome feeling, nevertheless! And this I shall put toward a driving school. I had always imagined I would have a driver's license by the time I was 18. Or I would have at least gone beyond the first gear. My Ma had learnt how to drive at an early age and is a very good driver [or a racing driver, as my father puts it.] and she taught my father how to drive a car too! I always assumed that she would be the one to teach me. However, as my 18th birthday neared, the parents pushed for me to learn from a driving school. Which driving school? They decided to do some research and put me in the best damned driving school. The research is still not over [I'm not sure it even started] and I have decided to take this matter into my own hands. So yeah, I will find a driving school and a license soonest. And if I hit your car, someday, by accident - I'm sorry, in advance!
This third point in my agenda is to do really really really really well in my internal/half-year/end-of-term exams that start in about a week. I think I deserve to.
I will talk to as many people as possible in order to get even more confused about options after getting my Bachelor's degree in Sociology, with honors. One of my professors once said that a confused mind is an excellent sign. It means you're thinking and actually using your brain.
I will start working on a book.
I will be happy.

Signing off.

*Returns to studying "A Contribution To The Critique of Political Economy" by Marx*

AA. No, not Alcholics Anonymous. Something better.

2011-08-06T01:57:00.003+05:30

This year in June, my parents and I spent close to 25 days in the United States. Technically, we touched about 11 of the 50 states and the capital. The trip was incredible and brilliant. I had fun and I met a lot of my extended family. Okay bye.

That was the short version of that trip. For the real deal, keep reading!

I wasn’t and still am not entirely sure about how to write this post. Some of you may know, I aspire to be a travel writer someday. That’s a super exciting place for me to be at, someday, but I am as unsure of how to go about writing as I am an actual Homo sapien. But I won’t know until I give it a shot! So, this post is an attempt and it would be my first attempt - looking forward to feedback and maybe posting many different attempts soon.

Since my normal posts are humongous, I thought I’d go city by city to try doing some justice to these amazing places. [Btw, some of the links will lead you to photographs]

The first city I stayed at or visited in the States was Ann Arbor, Michigan. My brother Anand finished his Masters program at the University of Michigan at Ann Arbor and currently lives there. Ann Arbor is instantly charming and I felt a strange sense of familiarity. No, Ann Arbor isn’t as populated as an Indian city - in fact, of a population of roughly 150,000, one-third would constitute a floating population of students. It is as dirty as an Indian city can be squeaky clean. My sense of familiarity would be attributed to my time spent in Chandigarh, a planned Indian city. Chandigarh doesn’t have many tall buildings, neither does Ann Arbor. In fact, in Ann Arbor, the buildings never break the tree line (except maybe, the University Hospital). Chandigarh is clean as far as Indian cities go and maybe less populated too, relatively. They’re both small cities. Ann Arbor is possibly the most beautiful city in the US that I visited.

The thing that annoyed me most was to see everyone driving on the wrong side of the road, which was technically the right side. Honestly, this was the first thing that struck me. Despite it being almost a month since I returned to India, I am disoriented with regard to what side of the road is wrong. Or left.

Through the length of the trip, the abundance of natural resources in the US, struck me the most - land being the most prominent. There was just enough and more space for any and everyone.

It was amusing to notice that the concept of “compound walls” was practically non-existent. In India, we’re only too used to seeing areas marked out with the help of a wall - specially independent houses. Lack of markers like “the compound” would ordinarily imply lack of privacy. Ironically, back in India, we’re not entirely up for the idea of privacy. News travels quick. Specially through your maid who has more social circles than Google Plus could provide for. Narayana Murthy in “What we can Learn from the West” said that in the West, people are friendly without being intimate, while in India can be intimate without being friendly. That could maybe, apply to quite some cases I guess. But at another level, I secretly love the Indian interference/intimacy. In Sociology, we study about Emile Durkheim and his work on Suicide. He believes that suicide is social, not psychological - collective, not individual. It occurs when one’s social system breaks down - be it the elementary group or secondary. And back home, the fact that you have so many people asking about you or talking or interfering with you - weirdly does imply that they care and maybe your social network will stay intact. This is just a hypothesis, I could be completely wrong for all I know! But we’re so used to seeing people around and inadvertently knowing about them, that getting depressed enough to be driven to commit suicide may be less. Enough morbid issues, though.

Oh also, the sun sets pretty late, which further means that it’s pretty bright till about 9.30 PM! Which is funny because when you’re eating dinner and back home, you’re absolutely used to it being dark outside when you eat.

Ann Arbor may not be particularly known for it - but it’s an excellent place to walk around. We stayed at a cozy inn - the Lamp Post Inn. Frommers has in fact, named the Lamp Post Inn as the best value for travel in town. And I think I’d agree! The staff there was incredibly sweet and the rooms were super comfortable - I particularly enjoyed the breakfast we got each morning. Not because it was anything exotic but pretty simple, basic. I’d have bagels with cream cheese and cherios with milk. And then Sunny D Orange juice!

Right next to the Inn was the Lamp Post Plaza - complete with a pharmacy, dry cleaners’, Roly Poly Sandwiches and the best department/grocers’ store ever - Trader Joe’s! If my parents could, they would live there. Small things like raspberries and blueberries amused us.Cinnamon scones were a favorite. And, surprise surprise, Masala Dosai! Seriously tasty! We didn’t even need a reason to go there. We’d go to Trader Joe’s and buy something even if it wasn’t required. We did our bit to push up Michigan’s economy is all I’ll say!

Downtown Ann Arbor is pretty much the same area as the location of the Central Campus of the University of Michigan. As most Downtown areas are known to be, this was a happening part of the city and bustling with people and activity. Two theaters - State Theater and Michigan Theater are located here. Tons of restaurants, cafes are located here - the variety of cuisines available were excellent! In fact, if you’re ever at Ann Arbor - please do visit Suvai. It’s an excellent Indian restaurant - hands down, the best dahi vada I’ve ever tasted in my life! Apart from there, Ethiopian food at The Blue Nile was an amazing experience. I’m not saying I’m a huge fan of the cuisine but interesting (and it’s the good interesting) wala experience. You can draw parallels with south-Indian food - dosas and south-Indian sabjis! Mexican food is, as everyone would say, closest to Indian food. Of course, Starbucks is present - my cousin Archita and I believe it’s possible to draw a map of the US with Starbucks outlets alone!

Coming to natural sights - Nichols Arboretum is this huge green area just a few blocks away from the Central Campus. The River Huron flows across it! It’s the most gorgeous trail I’ve ever been on - the green! Wow. And then to climb down and find a river flowing by. I’m really not describing it right but then, I guess you’ve gotta go visit. Something similar to the Arb would be the Matthaei Botanical Gardens - both of which are managed by the UofM. Together, they consist of over 700 acres of gardens and research areas.

There’s another park - Gallup Park - that has the River Huron flow through it. We went paddle boating on the Huron river there - the more adventurous would opt for canoe-ing though! Walking through the Park and seeing the sun set or almost set or just the cloud formation is unbelievably worth it. Yes, I took quite some pictures but camera can’t do justice to experiencing beauty first-hand. You don’t want to speak but just stare away for as long as possible and wonder how on certain days, nature can be that beautiful.

Did I say Gallup Park made you wonder if nature could be that beautiful? The Argo Dam area will make you wonder that and about how lucky some people get. Let me define lucky by explaining a scenario : You wake up in the morning, get out to your balcony or even just the window and you look out at a beautiful mini … lake formed by the Argo Dam on the River Huron. It’s just out there, any time you want to look at it, it’s like your back yard! We went there around 7 PM and wow, was it stunning!

Ann Arbor is home to a bunch of museums but we managed to visit only the University of Michigan Museum of Art. It had a good collection - but then, my parents and I don’t exactly visit museums of art much, we couldn’t entirely appreciate it.

Of course, this entire trip wouldn’t have been as memorable and as enjoyable or even as… extensive maybe, had it not been for Lalitha Aunty and Nattu Uncle. Their enthusiasm to show us around was heartening. And each day, one after the other, the places they took us to, only got better!

In terms of time spent, we spent the most time at Ann Arbor - about 10 days. Superbly relaxing.

Idhar Udhar Ki Baatein

2011-05-24T17:25:00.007+05:30

Hello fellow bloggers and readers (if I have any that is. That's the downside of no *poke* available on Blogger unlike Facebook - I don't know if someone's really reading it or if I'v visited my blog too many times for the visitor number to go up. For the record, I dislike the whole notion of *poke* - it's weird! So I wouldn't know but I'll assume my parents are reading this at some point),

Over the last few months, there'v been numerous occasions that'v inspired me to post a blog. Evidence would suggest that I wasn't inspired enough. The inspiration for the lack of being inspired can possibly be attributed to this funny not-so-little transitive/intransitive verb known as 'procrastination'. 'To put off intentionally or habitually' is how it is defined in Merriam Webster's dictionary. I think 'to put off habitually' sums up my case. And I think I'v mentioned this in a previous blog post too :| Also, my favorite video-blogger, Charlie McDonnell v-logged about this.

One thing I learnt early on but never applied to my life was : News doesn't wait. You need good timing. [Back in October 2005, an earthquake hit North India, the epicenter was in Pakistan. We felt it and I wrote a huge email to my family about the experience. My uncle said that had it reached earlier, it could'v been published in a National Daily!]. And since the events mentioned below [except the last one] were um, news-centric events - writing about them now would possibly bore you and I probably won't have the same flow as I would have, writing about it before. There's always a difference and one can usually point it out - specially when things aren't as fresh in your memory. People often talk of events (specially famous/great ones) and say that they're fresh in their memory, as if it'd happened yesterday. Excellent for them! Somehow, my memory about events has been very blurry, specially over the last six months. And even if I try to reconstruct them and write about them - justice, my friends, it would be not. So I thought I'd leave a summary of each of them. Making it a cumulative post.

Some of the stuff I wanted to talk about but couldn't :

The Epic Semi-Final : India Vs Pakistan And How We Kicked Their Ass.

This match possibly trumped the Final that India played to win the World Cup 2011. The energy of this match reminded me of India Vs Pakistan, Final T20 World Cup. I can't even begin to talk about the importance this particular match was given. The media focus. The political angle. How Team India came out to play and won the match is beyond me. They don't call him Captain Cool for nothing. It really doesn't put the pressure off you when the Prime Minister of your country invites the rival team's Prime Minister. Also, when you see that people are buying tickets for Lakhs of rupees. And the fact that the match was played at the PCA Stadium, Mohali added to the hysteria. Mohali is in Punjab. When you talk of the state of Punjab, it has delicate history, probably nowhere close to as delicate as Kashmir when it comes to Indo-Pak relations. Punjab, on both sides of the border, has a rich culture, tradition etc. and faced the bloodiest end of the partition. There is a lot of shared history of the people of the Punjab.

Oh also, this was the first and only match (till now) where I tweeted through the match. It was actually fun. Possibly the first time I spent more than 10 minutes on Twitter. I got the hang of this micro-blogging website. But, 140 characters is 'rhomba* too much' self-control for me.

The Epic Final : India Vs Sri Lanka And How We Kicked Their Ass Too.

Team India, The Men In Blue, whatever you choose to call them, won the ICC World Cup 2011. A nation of a billion bled blue. The after party, my friends, was the biggest one. The nation felt a hangover the next morning. In Delhi, India Gate was the place to be at. I was told by some friends that Delhi looked like the safest place that night(mid-night/morning). If not for the billion hearts, I felt happy for one person. It's God. He also goes by Sachin (Ramesh Tendulkar). :) Cynics and Cricket-Haters may have found it ridiculous (and maybe I did too, after 2 days of being super-happy!) but like I said in my previous post, Cricket is a religion here. Btw, the other God also happened to be at Wankhede for the match. Rajni saar :)

Anna Hazare, The Lokpal Bill, A Movement Of The Masses?

Anna Hazare is a social activist, recognized for his contribution to the development of a village in Maharashtra and establishing it as a model village. He started a 'fast-unto-death' on 5th April, 2011 so as to exert pressure on the government to enact a strong anti-corruption act. Since he staged this 'fast-unto-death' at the Jantar Mantar, New Delhi - my parents and I decided to go show our solidarity. I will admit that I do not know the finer elements of the proposed Bill. If you ask me why I think this may bring an end to corruption, I'll say no. I think all of us know that an assumption such as the above is too idyllic. But it sure could get a system in place and I support that. Apart from all of that, from a point of view of 'social movements', it intrigued me. Now, I'm no expert on how social movements work, what constitutes one, whether it is completely media-driven or if it would even bring some change. I am still learning. But being there, made me feel awesome because I haven't seen these many Indians showing their support (there were meetings across the nation) and coming together for something apart from Cricket! I do not intend to belittle our janta but I think when we look back, at least, in my eighteen years of existence, I haven't seen such solidarity on an issue which isn't Cricket! Sure, we have candle-light marches asking for justice, but does the whole of India participate? Maybe not literally.

Oba-whoops!-Osama Died :O

Osama bin Laden, the most famous terror mastermind, the man behind the 9/11 action died on May 2nd, 2011. After years of rumors, you had to believe it when Obama, the President of the United States of America, was going to address the world the aforementioned news. May 2nd, 2011 is also possibly the one day where the same blooper occurred through the day and it was no minor one. It's no secret that the name of the President of the United States of America sounds similar to the terror mastermind's name. Obama and Osama. On May 2nd, 2011 - almost every news channel committed this blooper : The news breaking in at this hour is that Oba ... I mean, Osama bin Laden has been killed really, by US forces at Abbottabad, near Islamabad. [That was just an attempt at imitating our news anchors, who over emphasize on all the wrong words; they also add a 'really' every here and there.] Anyway, this news reminded me of the time, during a vacation at my grandparents' place in Madras, my grandma woke me up to say the Veerappan had been killed! It was equally hard to believe. Of course, Osama's death does not by any means imply that terrorism is on the decline or any such thing. There might be tons of others like him out there. I can only appeal to them to not kill innocent people in the name of god. Another issue that it does or has brought up into the international spotlight is that there's something fishy going on in Pakistan! Since my knowledge of politics and international relations is limited, I will avoid commenting on this. Oh also, I do feel that Osama's death avenged the barbaric killing of the people who died on 9/11 due to the terror strike as well the many other innocent people who were convicted because their Asian origin was just plain suspicious.

How I Still Abso-freakin-lutely Love DDLJ.

Dilwale Dulhaniya Le Jayenge. I'm not ashamed to admit that this movie shall forevermore, remain an all-time favorite. Since this has nothing to do with news, current or otherwise, I shall devote my next blog post to it.

Lamba ho gaya kya? If you made it till this line (and I mean, by reading all of the above too), I thank you!

*'Rhomba' means 'too much' in Tamil. And now, you may wonder why I wrote 'Rhomba too much' when 'Rhomba' equals 'too much' anyway, I just made this all sound like 'x' equals 'rhomba' and 'rhomba too much' equals 'x squared'. But it's just the way we say it in Madras :)

A(t) Silly Point?

2011-03-10T20:15:00.002+05:30

Can you feel it?

Can you hear it?

Can you see it?

It’s 2011! This is India. If you answered anything but a yes to those questions or don’t get what I’m talking about – forgive me, but where the hell are you!? Because you sure as hell aren’t here.

You don’t have to be a Cricket fan to have answered ‘yes’ or to understand what I meant. You just need to be Indian. And I am not referring to the two as mutually exclusive groups although it is possibly about ... 90% true. Rough guess yeah. But it’s not just a sport. It’s a religion. And possibly forms a majority, if Cricket fans constitute a religious group.

Being an Indian or living in India – it’s hard not to be affected by Cricket-a-holic-ness / Cricket-itis / Cricket-mania / Cricket-fever – whatever you may choose to call it. Whether you like it or not, it just does get to you. And you may thrive in it – enjoy the experience and get hooked. Or you may suffer through it, as painful as it may be.

It’s that time of the year, or rather – this time, it’s that year again. It’s the ICC World Cup. And this time the Indian Subcontinent [India, Sri Lanka and Bangladesh - yeah, excluding Pakistan] is hosting it!

I’ve been a fan of this game as far back as I can remember. Courtesy: my parents and brother. However my passion began showing it’s true colours only during the ICC World Cup 2003. I was eleven years old and February-March ’03 were the highlight of my year. India’s final against Australia, Sehwag ki Ma, Praying for rain un-wrecking play, Pakistan losing wickets by me eating bananas [weird theory to be explored later], Kaifi notebook – some stuff which will stay as memories for life.

Can you feel it? You bet your ass you do! Why aren’t there any big movie releases? WORLD CUP! Random TV sale schemes – WORLD CUP! Random stupid schemes by mobile network people – WORLD CUP!

So, can you hear it? *TV blares with the cheering at a Stadium* - You just heard it! Go to anyone's house, during a match, specially a match with India playing - the TV is on. You may have the most interesting conversation but the TV will be on, my friend. It will be! Though this isn't too common anymore, but you can still see chotu transistor radios with the commentary of the match playing at the pan-wallah's chop or the chai-wallah's shop. Overhearing conversations now, are we? They're inevitably about how a certain team is performing, what all Dhoni is doing wrong, which guy should be dropped, who should make it to the Playing XI, God [read : Sachin], the epic England Vs. Ireland is still definitely on everyone's mind, more on Dhoni and his right and wrong. We don't think twice before criticizing the Captain. We're born experts, with years of observing the game by sitting in front of the Television and councils over coffee/chai. So what if some of us have never played in a match, we know our shit, dude. We offer free advice. That it may not make the most practical sense or that it may not reach the concerned individuals is not the silly point. Okay, this World Cup, we also get to hear Ganguly. Apna Saurav may not be in the Playing XI anymore, but he's in the Saying XI thousand. Okay, bad attempt at rhyming =/ He's now part of the TV shows with a panel of 'experts' - he's awesome, yeah. But he looks tired. Like smiling for the camera, discussing the same thing over and over and over again, analysing every freaking ball and every shot is more exhausting than playing a Test Match. Give the dude a break!

Can you see it? By this point, I expect you to give me a hell yeah! Considering, there's a telecommunication medium for transmitting and receiving moving images that can be monochromatic or multicoloured. Arey! Television re! Also, there're stadiums where - if you're lucky enough to get passes/tickets - you get to watch the match! I'v been to see very few matches myself but the atmosphere is like woah! That sort of energy, elation, disappointment, noise, passion, attention-seekers - all in a single venue. It's an experience worth the price of the ticket. This excitement and passion reaches a peak when two special teams play against each other. India Vs Pakistan. That's the mother of all matches! The nail-biting tension, the slogans, the controversy, the intensity, the passion - I haven't ever been to watch such a match yet, but I feel it even while sitting at home with my family! That's the magic of a cricket match where India and Pakistan play each other. So, my whole banana-eating theory I mentioned before? So get this, I would eat a banana and a Pakistani wicket would fall. True story. Oh wait, this was backed with Hanuman Chalisa! And no. I did not ever eat eleven bananas - yeah, my luck isn't that awesome! But true story. References, you ask? My family! They always made sure there were bananas around =)

So World Cup 2003 had a brilliant final, India Vs Australia. It was intense. What with rain playing spoil-sport, literally. Our entire family had gathered at Velachery in Chennai. We prayed. We recited the Vishnu Sahasranamam. Slightly deranged, you say? I'm sure you do stuff like that too! It took us twenty years to reach a World Cup final, after 1983 - the only World Cup we ever won. We lost.

World Cup 2007 however, was utter phail. India crashed out of the World Cup. Loads of ... stuff happened. But then, we won the first T20 World Cup! In your face! The final? India Vs Pakistan! =D One of the most intense T20 matches I'v ever ever seen.

So, right now, India is at the top of the table in Group B. So far, so good. The points table as of today is right below. *Shouts like a retard - In-di-yaa In-di-yaa * Let's see how 2011 goes down, shall we? =)

Group A

Teams	P	W	L	NR	T	Points	NRR
New Zealand	4	3	1	0	0	6	+1.85
Pakistan	4	3	1	0	0	6	+0.76
Sri Lanka	4	2	1	1	0	5	+2.66
Australia	3	2	0	1	0	5	+1.81
Zimbabwe	3	1	2	0	0	2	+0.08
Canada	4	1	3	0	0	2	-2.08
Kenya	4	0	4	0	0	0	-3.40

Group B

Teams	P	W	L	NR	T	Points	NRR
India	4	3	0	0	1	7	+0.99
England	4	2	1	0	1	5	+0.05
West Indies	3	2	1	0	0	4	+2.67
South Africa	3	2	1	0	0	4	+1.75
Ireland	3	1	2	0	0	2	-0.30
Bangladesh	3	1	2	0	0	2	-1.76
Netherlands	4	0	4	0	0	0	-2.73

Courtesy : http://cricketvillage.blogspot.com/2011/01/icc-world-cup-2011-points-table.html

Before 2012, before I become lazier.

2011-01-01T11:14:00.002+05:30

'Happeh Boo Year!' as my behen Radhika wished me.

2011. Nu decade. Another chance for us to get cheesy and forward the message today and sometime in November about the date being unique - "Today the date is 1.1.11/11.11.11. This will never happen again in atleast our life time. Forward this message to 1111/111111 people and you will get good luck or else something bad will happen to you. I did not want to take the risk, yadda yadda" Well, with Airtel and Vodafone offering you unlimited free texting [read : 21000], it may be possible to forward that message to the prescribed number of people for just Rs. 88/89.

Btw, what's with the new Airtel logo? What the faluda [as my 'deer' friend Raabu behen would exclaim] is wrong with them!? They reportedly spent Rs. 200 Crores pan-India on the adverts. Um, WHY? :O I can go and on and on and on and on, being an Airtel loyalist. But as long as they give me my 21000 text messages a month, I'm fine with shutting up right now.

Right now, the weather is super super chilly here in Delhi. Typing sans gloves but with a hoodie, I am sorta freezing.

And so is my brain. Freezing that is. My first year internal exams begin in less than five days and my brain is refusing to work. Thrasymachus can go and at KFC for all my brain cares. But then I'm studying McDonaldization and not KFCization =/

All I want to do on this first day of this decade is to shut myself in my room, settle myself in my blanket and with a steaming cuppa coffee and loads of junk to eat - watch movies. Back-to-back, my friend, back-to-back.

But Ma is reminding me gently in the background to 'prioritize, prioritize, precious time!'

So I guess this is me signing off for today, good luck and ... good morning =/

2010-08-18T18:33:00.002+05:30

I proved myself wrong yet again. Or rather, I proved right what I have proved time and again.

Yes, I proved that I'm just way too dynamic to be true!

In other words, I reinforced/demonstrated/corroborated the fact that I cannot stick to something for too long [an exception being education- haven't given up on that one yet :D]

I began blogging in November '09. Till May '10 - I seemed consistent at posting at least one post each month. My frequency of updates should'v shot up - what with about 2-3 months with nothing to do apart from Facebook stalking [a topic I shall write on real REAL soon], eating and sleeping. In my defense, there are at least 5 posts in the draft stage. But that cannot defend my habit of not sticking to things I start.

You're reading about the person who joined and left Kathak classes, thrice. Joined Carnatic Music classes - attended three classes and left. Took up an online internship - didn't go through with it. Randomly started collecting pictures of signs in wrong English - soon had an album that friends loved - but soon after stopped appreciating it when her friends came, all excited showing off stuff they'd spotted.

*takes a half hour Pasta break*

I could go on; but I've painted the picture clear enough for now :)

There were people who weren't exactly complaining when I hadn't updated my blog - read : people who thought I wrote posts that were too long for average human beings to sit through reading without falling asleep [Dhruv Gupta]

There were others who would flood my Facebook Wall telling me to (re)start blogging and try to threaten me [Malvika Kapur] There were those I had pestered to start blogging and they reminded me to (re)start it myself [Kunal Shinde] There was Behen [Radhika Saxena] who updated her blog and (un)consciously hoped she'd rub off on me. There were many others, including family, who wondered why I had stopped.

Thank you for you concern :) I do hereby promise to never abandon my blog - for good or for verse :)

Some updates :

May 2010

21st May 2010 shall go down in mystory. CBSE Results Class XII - truly one of the worst days in my life. But I'm past it - lets just say that things weren't close to what was expected. In the two weeks that followed, I'd met with more accidents than I had in a year (thankfully, all of which were minor in nature)

June 2010

The initial part of this month was spent buying and submitting college application forms and my first ever visit to North Campus :) I made a short trip to Bombay and reached back in time to see the first cut-off list of Delhi University. And soon enough, the day came when I would secure admission in a college. I got my course - Sociology (H) - in Kamala Nehru College, a college really close to my house, an all-girls institution. I spent 5-6 harrowing hours on the day I secured my admission - but it was worth it since it brought some stability in my world.

July 2010

Holidays were coming to a close and I felt like I had spent the most unproductive 3 months of my life. Oh wait - I did something productive in the first week of July - a trip to mera apna Chandigarh :)

Oh wait wait - I also finally started college!

August 2010

Bhaiya's spending the month in India :) AND I GOT A CAMERA! *runs around in joy* *bangs into a pole* *gets back up and runs again* Um and I got a random ear piercing :P

I have a lot to blabber about and I shall keep it for the posts to follow :)

Cheers!

Of hugs, high fives and being TamBrahm

2010-05-25T02:15:00.004+05:30

Hugs never came naturally to me. They weren't my first instinct when I met someone. Maybe it was because, in my family, we didn't exactly hug each other all that often. Honestly, they weren't even a big deal. We hugged each other in times of ... emergencies-when, frankly, nothing but hugs work! Or if someone else leaned in to hug-you just hugged them back.

In my last year in Chandigarh, my friends hugged me pretty much each time we met to go attend coaching classes together. Again, it wasn't too often that we did that. Of course, right before I left for Delhi-there were major hugging sessions :)

On joining school at Delhi, I began noticing my classmates hugging each other [read : classmates who were friends with each other] every morning before classes began. It looked like a whole, elaborate ritual, wherein, as you enter the class-you spotted your friends and hugged them! Initially, I found this pretty ridiculous an affair. Soon, unconsciously, I was part of the circuit... I recall a remark made by my school's principal Sr. Nirmalini- All of you look like you're meeting each other after a few years at ... London's Heathrow Airport!

I used to think its just me. You know, the whole not-so-much-of-a-hugger deal? But lately, I wonder if its a ... TamBrahm trait. I can never generalize this, obviously. Its just a hypothesis and can possibly encompass a lot more social groups. And I do realize that I may not be in a position to make this hypothesis seeing as I haven't spent enough time in the Tamil Heartland! Neither have I been surrounded with people from my region all that much. But my general ... opinion is that us South Indians hug a lot less than ... maybe our Northern counterparts (?) and I wonder why ...

All I can say is I'm game for a High-Five anytime of the day or night! But hugs? I think I would go with this "Hugs grease the wheels of the world."

Which is why I could go to the extent of hugging my ... not-so-small-yet-large-ish Mickey Mouse when I desperately needed one :)

To my closest friends - I hope you do know that, just because I'm almost never the first one to hug you doesn't mean you're mean any less. Sure, hugs are known to be the shortest distance between friends. But guess what-there's no distance between us :)

P S - Ask for one and you totally get one :)

P P S - I do not mean to make Tamil Brahmins an exclusive group in this regard. As a student of Sociology, I learn not to be subjective [and to a large extent, condemn the caste system but oh well!] But since I'm a part of this community, I took it as an example.

Up In The Air

2010-04-27T02:23:00.005+05:30

When I left for Madras [I refuse to call it Chennai, Madras sounds more like home] for the second time within a month from Delhi, a friend of mine asked me whether flying so much was even healthy!

When I answered saying that I don't mind flying, in fact I loved it-Disha seriously began doubting whether I was human [quoting her, "You like flying! :O What kind of a creature are you?!]

Her retort got me thinking.

Do I really like flying? Do I like reaching the Airport an hour before I need to take the flight? Do I like the whole process of checking-in, security checks, boarding and then finally flying? Do I mind the sometimes, uncomfortable seat? The random, annoying co-passenger? A baby crying through the length of the flight? The turbulence? The food? The usual, non-smooth landing? People switching on their cell phones the second the flight touches the ground? Pushing your way to get off the flight? Waiting for your checked-in luggage? Scanning the mass of people outside the arrival lounge to look out for someone who came to pick you up? Or even standing (very rarely for me though) in line to take a pre-paid Taxi?

And I realized that I'm in love with each and every part of it. I'm strange, yes. But there are others who'd agree with me :)

I was probably 3 months old when I first sat on a flight (maybe, "slept" would be a better choice than sat although ironically, the fact is-i can never sleep well on a flight) and around 8 years old when I first flew as an unaccompanied minor.

It was all such an interesting experience, fascinating. When you flew as an unaccompanied minor-they pretty much took care of everything for you. You'd get special attention from the flight's crew. The ground staff usually tended to be happy to get rid of you ASAP! As a kid I remember thinking that being a part of the in-flight crew could be the coolest job ever. Sigh.

As I grew older, I actually began "dressing up" to go to the Airport! For me, it was generally a time where I was alone, responsible and in what I would think of as an "elite" environment. Don't ask me for further elaboration on the last reason :)

The night before travelling alone the first time around, I had a nightmare about this man sitting next to me, introducing himself as Mr Hijacker!

I still like pushing around the trolley, waiting in line to check-in, collecting my Boarding Pass and heading toward the Security Check.

The Security Check is the part where I'm usually the most paranoid. And maybe the paranoia wasn't present from the beginning. It could be attributed to one particular incident when they asked to recheck my backpack as they suspected me of carrying a pair of scissors. Well it turned out to be the lady with the bag before mine. But ever since then, I try to be overly careful! Its something similar to how, when I used to carry my cell phone to school, I'd make sure all the alarms were off and sometimes I'd pretty much dismantle my entire cell phone!

Once I'm through, waiting for Boarding to be announced is the perfect time to people-watch, a hobby of mine. [I do not have stalker-like tendencies, just in case you were wondering :D] Its amusing, alluring and engaging to watch people going about their Life. You come across families going on vacations.

The kids are all hyper and the parents usually seem to have a tough time keeping them from bringing the Airport down!

You have the hot shot "MBA type". They cannot imagine life beyond their blackberry/laptop/cell phone. Constantly typing away-making power point presentations (?) or talking away to glory on the phone is how you recognize those.

Then there are more hot shot Exec uncles, usually with white hair and with either a newspaper or a book in hand. They're the wizened Execs :D

We also come across the high-school/college-going teenager (male and female), usually scanning the crowd for some one to check out. Or they could be absorbed in listening to their iPod/mp3 player or even reading a book.

The "just married" or the "honeymoon" couples aren't hard to figure out at all. If its a north-indian couple, spotting the red bangles just ... defines who they are. Usually the guy seems to be all nice and caring, picking up the bag, buying stuff to eat or something. They look really sweet, sometimes enough to make your blood sugar levels shoot up, maybe.

A middle aged woman travelling alone, usually looks bored. Or is reading a book. Or could probably be people-watching like me!

Old uncles and aunties are, over the last few years, a more common site at the International terminal. What with their sons and daughters in the IT Industry and working outside of India :D And since I have traveled outside of India just once, about 5 years ago-I won't comment much.

Thats pretty much all the types of people you come across.

I've always, always had this fantasy wherein, my flight would be delayed by quite a few hours. In a city, where I've no one that I know [though thats pushing it far-in India, you always know someone, everyplace!] And randomly, I'd end up having an amazingly interesting conversation with some really hot guy [note to Amma or any other ... older relative of mine : Nope, this hasn't happened yet. And in all my "flying" history, my flight has never been delayed more than half an hour. I also assure you that I do not speak to strangers at the Airport :)] and we'd decided to go explore the city ... :)

Airport terminals are usually a rip-off regarding um, edible stuff. Inflated Prices. But if you're hungry and joints like KFC [Disha :D] are right there-you tend not to think much. But those are much better than the ... random stall selling water etc. are Oh-My-God-Are-You-Kidding-Me prices.

Also, the renovation going on to ... beautify (?) terminals in all major Airports just made them way more interesting. I love hanging out at Terminal 1D, IGI Airport, New Delhi and the one at Chattrapati Sivaji Aiport in Bombay. They're amazing. The ek dum "International" feel dene wale terminals :)

Boarding Gates close 15 minutes before departure. Another issue that causes me to succumb to paranoia! Sitting in the coach that takes you to the aircraft is ... uneventful. But recently, that was when I witnessed an amazing site-we were right next to this Emirates aircraft that was taxiing the runway, about to take off!

Once I board the flight, finding my seat is not as big a task as the whole "inching through the crowded aisle" part.

Fortunately for me, I have never been seated with unpleasant company. Usually they just don't talk! But one memory still stands out when I was seated with someone, who must've been in his early thirties. Way back when I was 10 years of age. I was going through this phase of reading the "Matrimonial" column in the newspapers-only for amusement, mind you! Some of the advertisements were hilarious and provided basic entertainment :) And I remember having a conversation with that ... Uncle about this new-found means of entertainment. He asked me to find him a suitable girl and we played that game for a little while, after which he showed me his wife's picture-I remember thinking at the time that she was extremely pretty! Later on, he let me exchange my aisle-seat with his window-seat so I could see the view while we were landing :)

Once when I was flying with a cousin sister of mine, we ended up identifying one of the crew members as an ex student of our school! And that was probably the only instance where I also spoke with the Captain of the flight. On seeing this "Mathemagic" book in my hand, we told me that once we were passing Bhopal, he'd come along once more and that I would show him some... magic tricks. That never happened :P

Weirdly enough, I've never experienced a smooth landing. But some day... Yes. Some day :)

The Gods of Baggage Claim have never particularly liked me. It is therefore, no surprise that I usually wait the longest for my checked-in baggage! Now that I'm used to it, I love that part too!

And then... you walk out the doors that separate life and the high life.

From Jessica to Ruchika

2010-04-16T15:48:00.004+05:30

She was 14 years old. A future tennis champion perhaps, she did show the potential. Steffi Graf was her idol. At 14, I remember my dreams and I'm sure back in 1990, most teenage girls had pretty much the same interests.

Cut to 1993. She was around 17 years of age, my age. She committed suicide...

Unlike many kids, who around that age, commit suicide due to pressure from parents or themselves about studying, about the dreaded "Boards" or about planning your future, she didn't. In fact it had been reported, she had been thrown out of school on ground of non-payment of fees back in 1990. So what happened?

S.P.S. Rathore, former DGP, Haryana was also the President of the Haryana Lawn Tennis Association in 1990. HLTA is where Ruchika and her friend Aradhna would play their Tennis. Ruchika Girhotra was molested by Rathore. Her friend Aradhna witnessed it.

Their complaint was not registered as an FIR but a Daily Diary Record. For 3 years, her family was harassed in every possible way-her brother Aashu was slapped with numerous cases against him. She was thrown out of school. According to Aradhna, their freedom had been taken away and Ruchika no longer smiled. Aradhna's father faced troubles too. He was a Government servant and was consistently asked to leave the case or leave his service.

Rathore on the other hand was promoted by Government after Government. He was even recommended and awarded the President's Medal.

19 years later, in 2009, the sentence awarded to Rathore was 6 months imprisonment and Rs. 1000 fine.

A joke?

This is something that would "hit a blind person in the eye" as just plain wrong. So, why did the Indian Judicial System let Rathore go with a smile on his face? Why did it fail us?

Or should we be just too used to this? As a famous lawyer, Harish Salve, put it "waking up from Jessica to Ruchika"...

In another sense, Ruchika's case is not the first of its kind. Neither is it the worst of its kind. But do those facts make it any less grave?

Also, you might wonder why I'm writing this post now. Its been quite a while. A few months have passed since this case was brought up again. Shouldn't I have written it all out then? With the anger, the passion and all that I was feeling then?

The truth is, I did start off writing this post then. Believe me, I was impassioned right from the moment I had heard about this. I remember getting upset even, with a friend of mine who didn't exactly know about this case!

Like most other things that cause a nation's people to be furious and long for justice-even if it is for a person they've never met or heard about before-the Ruchika Girhotra case died down too. Unfortunately.

It was December 2009, I think. Every TV News Channel looked like they couldn't think beyond this case. Now? I think you might catch a line or two on the news ticker.

Agreed. Maybe, right now there aren't many developments regarding the case. But its the manner in which it was initially sensationalized, that right now, you can't help but wonder if anyone cares any more... We get on with our lives.

Then again, how long can I expect us-the masses-to be involved with "one case"? We tend to be involved in our own life problems. We have to.

Perhaps, what I mean is that it isn't enough to be shocked every time we hear of something like this. Why don't we get to a situation where we stop getting shocked, not because we become insulated but because there is almost nothing to shock us?

Quoting MJ, "Heal The World

Make It A Better Place
For You And For Me
And The Entire Human Race
There Are People Dying
If You Care Enough
For The Living
Make A Better Place

For You And For Me"

Slightly overly optimistic perhaps. "We're all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars." [Oscar Wilde]

Oh well, public memories are short. Or at least supposed to be.

Note : I know one thing that didn't fail us. Friendship. Looking at Aradhna and listening to how she's been fighting for her friend all these years, I no longer take the meaning of friendship lightly. Thank you for reminding me that its not just about clicking photos with each other, hanging out, etc. Its about really staying there. Forever. And after.

PS- I realize I may have lost the flow while writing this post. My mind is ... dynamic that way! Since I began writing this post a few months ago, its a bit off track at times. Sorry about that.

Random Thought #2

2010-03-24T15:29:00.010+05:30

Wikipedia.... It's just so absolutely deviating. Distracting. Inconsistent :| I could go on, except I'm not sure listing out all the synonyms from my English Word Meaning/Synonym/Antonym Giving Website could quite make my point there.

Most of us had heard about how attention spans are just ... shrinking. More so because of the internet... So it's no surprise when your mind can deviate with Wikipedia!

So I'll just take any word just go Wikipedia it :P [Yes yes, I used it as a verb!]

I Wikipedia "random" :)

Somewhere, while reading it-I click on "probability"

Then I get interested in knowing what Wikipedia has to say about "gambling" : ))

"Supreme Court of the United States of America" LOL

Wait, what does "original jurisdiction" mean? 0_o

It's also the opposite of "appellate jurisdiction"

"Juries" :P

"The Roman Catholic Church" - what!? I know I study (oops, used to study) in a Convent School but still na!

"Holy Spirit" *grins*

...

How random is the holy spirit huh? =))

PS-I know that one won't usually be as ... distracted as in the example I have cited, but you get the point!

My Equation With Math

2010-03-22T16:18:00.004+05:30

I took an exam today that could very possibly be the last Math Exam I ever take.

Wow. After writing that sentence, re-reading it 5 times, I still cant get over it!

Mathematics. In my family (and the extended one too) this subject is a passion for most (read maternal family). The paternal side don't quite passionately discuss the same, but it's something that is supposed to come naturally.

Maths aa? Adalaam namaku natural-aa vey nalla varum.

[Oh Maths? LOL (literally, except here it'd be the conceited proud one!) It just comes so naturally to us!]

Oh and you know that stereotype? The one where if you're a South-Indian, more specifically a TamBrahm Maths is just in your blood and there is nothing you can do about it. It's just it. Period.

By the way-I'm not gonna do Math bashing or family bashing for that matter. This post is about my relationship with M.

It started out way back when. Ma, Math-her obsession and teaching-her passion. Every car-ride involved adding up the digits from the number plates of the numerous cars that passed us. Sometimes it was a competition between Archita (my cousin) and me! But obviously, I had to impress my love (M) and try doing better!

I learned Vedic Mathematics. Not fully. But whatever little my ego allowed me to learn from Ma. Yes, I'm still stubborn that way. Yes, I did attend tuition classes for Math despite having Ma right beside me.

I had this ... ritual of a kind where I used to watch a movie (preferably in the theater) before a Math exam. See, we were just so cool-I could actually manage to take it easy before a test with M :)

Over the years we grew together. It wasn't bad. The first high point we reached, in our relationship was Class 8. Final Examinations. Ma and Appa were out of station. I scored a 92! It took quite a while to sink in!

Then Class 9 happened. A low point. Oh well, every relationship has its lows...

In Class 10, Ma realized there was no way that I would sit with her to study and a Math tuition was the best option. Enter Mukesh Sir's classes.

Truly one of the most enjoyable times of my life. Friends. Random adventures. Food. The life!

And it did boost my arrogance once in a while when Sir pointed out to me at times because he wanted a 100 per cent from me. It felt awesome to know someone thought you had the potential. And then, in school, when my teacher told me that even if my answer was wrong, I'd get marks because my paper was presented really neatly. Fine. I'll stop bragging :D

Class 10. Board Examinations. Mathematics. The questions looked easy enough. I went from question to question, conquering them one at a time. A question for 3 marks-coordinate geometry posed a problem. I just couldn't come to an answer! I finished the rest of my paper, revised it all. Came back to this-it just refused to be solved! Oh well...

I saw my father at the School's gates, we sat in the car. I dumped my question paper.

And then I saw it...

Believe me when I say-the tears didn't stop for hours.

I had read the word bisected as intersected. No wonder I never solved that sum. To know that I was 3 away from reaching the pinnacle of this relationship made me feel almost as if my spirit were broken... [I do indeed have a flair for the dramatic :)]

The tears dried up after a few hours.

Result Day.

Mathematics 97

I still can't believe it.

You know, a picture of mine could have been all over the city for scoring a 100? The most disappointing reactions were those of my teachers. They just said-Hmm. Not a good. Hmm okay.

Oh before *result day* I took an important decision-one that would extend our ... relationship by a minimum of 2 years. Among the options I had to for subjects in Humanities, I had one between Math and Political Science. The choice was obvious! Yes, I took Math.

I don't remember thinking twice about the ... *other* possibility.

I love my family. And I'm not mad at them for this. But somewhere, I think for them-taking up Math was a saving grace of sorts. You see, we've a hierarchy down south. And it goes something like this :

SCIENCE

Commerce

humanities

So you can figure out where I'd rank in the hierarchy :) Tamilians are just supposed to be meant for Science. It's an obvious choice for most. As far as I remember, hardly any of my relatives have pursued Humanities. At least not at the School level. Commerce subjects make their random appearances. In fact, Madras/Chennai, a huge metropolitan, has only 3 or 4 schools that offer Humanities' subjects. Oh well...

[Whoa, that hierarchy part belongs to another post I'm working on! Will write ASAP :)]

Anyway, Class 11, right after the results (remember the 97? *smirks*), when I came to school, I became really complacent. I got 97 yo! No one can mess with me. I'm a genius. w00t!

It wasn't a good year for us.

As I entered Class 12, I was determined to make it our year. M & I needed it :)

I failed my first Unit Test. A shock. I know I hadn't put in effort, but I couldn't fail! Because that just doesn't happen. It never had.

I got over it and decided to work it. Really put in efforts and be the queen of the world! I thought I worked hard. I did pass this time, just pass.

I was disappointed. It felt like all that work didn't pay off.

I started slacking. Took it easy. Started ignoring M.

I took another set of exams. Failed Math. It was my first Pre Board. Which is when, talking to my friend made a difference. C V Ashwin. Or C v as we call him :) On Chat, he asked me whether just because I put in efforts once and it didn't work out well meant I should give up completely? It was not excuse enough to start slacking, but to just start working again! Thanks C v :)

And I did start working. Not awesome results. But better.

The whole of February was spent in Chandigarh. You could call it couple counselling ;)

We worked. Worked hard. At least I put in efforts.

Today I took my what could possibly be the last Math exam I'll ever take.

We parted on good terms :)

P.S.-I do not hate Math. In fact I sometimes enjoy solving certain sums. I may be intelligent enough to grasp the concepts. But I'm lazy/uninterested in ... indulging in that as a passion. And I don't wanna disrespect it as a subject either :)

P.P.S.- Yes. I do realize I'll have Math all around me. For life. But Integration and 3-Dimensional Geometry were the bane of my existence for the last one year. So for me, they're over!

2010-01-17T14:19:00.000+05:30

I was about 8 when my brother graduated High School. And I was pretty excited for him to calculate and reveal to me the year I would do the same. The magical year was to be 2010.

I liked it. A nice round number. And the beginning of a new decade. I decided that it would be a landmark in my life. I would turn 18 years old-an adult, for starters. I would enter College. And on my way to getting there-2010, I'd have done a lot of things. And I'd be leaving school behind!

For quite a while, leaving school behind and finally "beginning" my life was something that excited me all the time, till I turned 15 I guess.

I began realizing that this "safe" world wouldn't come back. And I decided that I would make every day count.

That didn't quite go as planned! Because life happened...

And as much as I wanted, it is really hard to try stopping time! Nope, I'm not talking about stopping time during Sondhi Ma'am's Science tuition classes :)

Tomorrow, I will attend my "Farewell and Valedictory Ceremony" in School. All I can ask myself right now is - when did I grow up? How did I manage to reach "right now"? Is it really happening?

I had heard of this day. A lot of times! And I had seen my "Seniors" go through the same passage of rite.

I know I know. My life hasn't ended! But I feel like I'm leaving a part of myself and moving on, moving ahead.

Carmel Convent. This name shall remain forever, synonymous with the word School for me. Some may murder me for saying this, but CCS is definitely not the best school there is. Many a time, I felt it was not a place that would appreciate every individual. I was a part of the crowd. Looking back, I wonder how many teachers in that school of mine in Chandigarh will remember my name and face for a long time to come. Maybe four. Or maybe I'm underestimating my teachers! I don't remember being chosen to do something. It took me years to finally be asked to go bring the notebooks from another room! But that would be a personal experience.

Yet those are not the memories I'll attach with my school.

Carmel Convent gave me friends, ones I will cherish for life. [Won't continue writing this point because if I start, I won't finish!]

Carmel Convent gave me this ... weird discipline for prayer. I say weird because, although we would have the prayer assembly through the PA system every morning, it's not like we never made fun of it or thought it was ridiculous! I'm sorry, but sometimes, us kids, we tend to make a joke out of a lot of important things. But the "prayer" part I'll miss for life.

Carmel Convent did make me fear breaking the law! I think in Chandigarh, we were known to be one of the more lenient schools (at least when compared to Sacred Heart :D ) But still, the whole fear I developed about being "caught" by the "Cabinet wali didi" (a phrase that always caused my brother to ask me-Why do you call them that? Do they live in Cabinets?"). When I joined Carmel in Delhi, it took me a while to get used to the ... lack of discipline! I'm not complaining, but it was strange :)

Carmel Convent gave me Christmas Carols :-D Yes, a weird thing to remember your school for! But Christmas was one of the most fun events in the academic year. Singing carols was even better! The *spirit* of Christmas was all around!

Now, things I'll definitely miss that were not quite part of the academic ... field are :

Sitting in the ground, in winter, with the sun's warmth on backs-gossiping like there was no tomorrow; Singing the School Anthem :); Panicking big time before the exams; Studying in the last moment and yet having time to ask your friends "Kitna kar liya?" and more recently, having time to go update your Facebook status in the midst of studying for the exam; Waking up in the morning to find that the day is being declared a holiday :); Copying the homework off some other kid who'd done it right in the morning [with me, my biology notebook through classes 7th-10th used be in demand :| ]; Roaming around in my school uniform [Yes, I know I'm weird :D]; [This part is more relevant to the lower classes but yeah :D] The whole group-ism wala issue-weird hierarchy :D I actually remember fighting along with my friends with a buncha "seniors" who were claiming our hop-scotch territory-one of our amazing points to win this "fight" was "my friend is our class topper, beat that!" We were 9 years old-go figure!; Okay this could be that unique weird reason-having really bad stomach ache that your mom teaches you the whole course for a Social Sciences exam which you end up topping *Yey!*; Getting amused when your classmates ask you to speak in Tamil because they just realized to their utter amazement that you are in fact Tamil!; That impending danger of your tiffen-box finishing in record time because it contained Dosas/Idlis, leaving nothing for you to fill your tummy with; Passing around chits in class so you could have a conversation with your friend :D

There is SO much more I want to write because this is definitely not it! And this shall be continued in my next post which will (hopefully) be posted real soon!

Random Thought #1

2009-12-15T14:59:00.000+05:30

A few weeks ago, my parents and I were in Chandigarh. Ma was getting her passport renewed and she had to go sign a few papers at the Police Station. She went dutifully, signed wherever she had to. Then they asked her for her name. "Malini", she said. "Surname?", the Burly Sardar Police Uncle asked. Ma answered, "I'm a Tamilian Brahman, humare yahaan nahi hota (we don't have surnames) aur hota bhi hai toh pati ka naam (and if we do add another name, it's the husband's name)" BSPU says, "Aise kaise ji? Sharma hoga (How this is ji? Sharma it must be)" Ma said, "Hum Iyers hai aur nahi, Sharma nahi hai (We're Iyers and nope, NOT Sharma)"

BSPU ended up declaring that my mother's name was indeed Malini Sharma, Sharma being her surname. Fine ji, whatever you say!

But that got me thinking about how weird it is that most South-Indians don't exactly have Surnames and it's either our father's or husband's (in the case of a woman) name that defines our *Full Name*. Surnames or Family Names don't exist in Tamil Nadu.

And what was more random was that, we'd never be known as the "Sivaram Khandaan/Parivar" unlike our Northern counterparts like the "Aggarwal Khaandaan" or the "Gupta Parivar" =D Tamilians will never have a "Tatas" or "Birlas" or "Ambanis" ...

So in a way, again, a random thought-it's more of an individual identity :) Which is maybe nicer, because sometimes we come across good-for-nothing heirs to some empire-like businesses and wonder what they ever did to have their name associated with something like that.

But then, the Brahman caste-divide is or atleast was more pronounced in Tamil Nadu. And the caste system essentially had to do with accident of birth!

I have no clue where I'm trying to go with this, but then, it is a random thought!

PS-The Random Thought Series would be just this stuff :P

TGIF :)

2009-12-01T23:57:00.000+05:30

On Friday the 27th, I turned 17 years and 2 weeks old.

I know! Huge achievement :)

But the other reason this day will go down in my story is because I paid Rs. 200 for Kulche and Paranthe :) At TGIF.

Those of us who grew up in Northern India (specially), Paranthas are our staple Breakfast diet. They're just awesome and I can't get enough of them! Kuchas are fun too. But that's besides the point.

Radhika Saxena, Dhruv Gupta and I went for our "Elite Lunch" to Thank Goodness it's Friday at the Select Citywalk Mall in Saket. Too bad we hadn't gone for a little bit of shopping before it and arrived in proper Cars :D [We did come in Chauffeur Driven Auto Rikshaws :D] Basically, Dhruv and I had to treat Radhika and each other for our birthdays.

When you're in your teens, on a budget (even though Mum and Dad are paying for it!), offers at fancy places for Lunch are bloody attractive.

The ambiance was excellent, Radhika and Dhruv kept eying this uber cool Guitar the whole time. The offer was simple : For Rs. 199 (only!) you could get a two course meal and choose out of options (Soups, Appetizers, Salads, Main Course and Desserts) and unlimited refills of the beverage of your choice. Yey!

After a lot of deliberation, we came up with a system of ordering two course meals but tasting one of each :)

As you can see, that is what we ordered. (My post-its, Radhika's pen, Dhruv's writing)

The waiter was thoroughly amused with our manner of ordering. But he was patient and didn't quite laugh at us, but with us! The added entertainment was the conversation the people sitting at the next table were having.

I-have-an-attitude-because-I-think-I'm-just-SO-hot Guy : Yeah dude. Like that chick totally wanted to go out with me but I kinda asked her to back off, I don't want anything serious.

Patient-polite-it's-okay-I'll-listen-to-you Friend : Who dude? Seema?

I-have-an-attitude-because-I-think-I'm-just-SO-hot Guy : No way dude. That other chick, sorta forgot her name. That one! Uh, um, Neha? Yeah I think it was her.

The-I'm-SO-not-interested-but-I-just-heard-Neha's-name Girl : Dude seriously? That wannabe chick?

You get the drift ...

Anyway, the Soup, Salad and Appetizer show up!

Dhruv : Oh chuddy, I'm so gonna try you Soup!

Radhika : Haan haan, even I'll try your Salad no!

Sharmada : DUDES! I got ... Kulchas.

Dhruv and Radhika : Haha, chal try karte hai.

*every one tastes the Grilled Pita Dippers*

All of us (unanimously) : Haha, yeh toh sach mein Kulche hai. =D

... Nice. But honestly, way too many Kulchas for what's supposed to be a Starter. Oh, they were triangle-shaped! The Soup was pretty good. The Salad sorta weird. Radhika and Dhruv helped me finish my Kuchas.

Round 1 : The Cream of Mushroom Soup is declared winner :)

Since the beverages were free and with unlimited refills, Dhruv took Coke, I took Limca. Radhika preferred downing our Coke/Limca :|

So, the main course!

Radhika's Pasta Arabiatta, Dhruv's Broken Noodles and my uber Mexican Vegetable Quesadilla arrived.

The Pasta looked yum, we tried it out and well... they were okay-not over the top amazingness!

The Broken Noodles. They were ... sweet :| We moved on!

Now, the Vegetable Quesadilla. As exotic as the name sounded (at least in an Indian household), the dish itself was symbolic of irony.

Sharmada : Hadh hai yaar! Pehle Kulche, ab Paranthe!

Dhruv and Radhika : LOL LOL, chal try karte hai. Itna bura toh nahi ho sakta hai.

*Radhika, Dhruv and Sharmada try out some Mexican Parathas*

R, D and S : OMG, not bad at all actually!

Sharmada : Still na. TGIF aayi, socha kuch *fancy* sa order karoongi, mile Kulche aur Paranthe. Yeh toh ghar par kha sakti thi na :(

Hunger got the better of us though ... and in no time, we'd finished the Pasta and Paranthas :) The Broken Noodles were sorta .... ignored. We were sweet enough already ...

But then, Round 2 : *drum rolls* The Vegetable Quesadilla is declared the winner!

And since we didn't want Dhruv to feel bad, you know, with the whole declaring winners and having only 2 rounds... Round 2.5 [read Consolation Prize] : Coke!

Well we did hang out after, had some dessert! Saw a few kids from my batch, Don Bosco ... *livin' it up!* and ... strip :|

I had started writing this post a few months ago! Unfortunately it got saved up in the drafts and I managed to ignore it for long. Sure the post lost it's flow in between, but I owe it (maybe not :P) to Radhika and Dhruv - two people I never thought I'd end up becoming close to.

Hell! There was a time I never thought Radhika would talk back to me, my first day on the bus! I thought she'd be yet another senior who just happened to share the same bus and bus stop with me. Slowly, we started talking, and walking :) And there has been no looking back :) Yey us Behen :) [http://www.flickr.com/photos/radhikasaxena/] [http://saxenaradhika.blogspot.com]

There was also a time when the only conversation Dhruv and I would have would go something like this :

Sharmada : Hey!

Dhruv : Hey! Ssup?

Sharmada : Not much blah blah blah, you?

*And Dhruv wouldn't reply for several more minutes and then ... *

Dhruv : Sorry I was ...

*and before he could type it out...*

Sharmada : On the phone? :D

Dhruv : :P

Sharmada : Whatever!

Dhruv : Don't whatever me!

Thank you :) Love you both, always!

There is so much more I want to blog about. But the Central Board of Secondary Education made other plans for me! But I promise to Blog real soon. I promise to Blabber. I promise to be Random-er :)

Bade Shehar Ki Chotti Si Baat

2009-11-26T13:03:00.000+05:30

A year ago, some barbaric ... people (it's hard for me to think of them as humans, to be honest) entered India, terrorized us and held our Country to ransom for something close to 72 hours.

The Mumbai Indians came through as they always have in any other situation of similar proportions. But 26/11 will go down as one day we would rather forget but will not forget.

I don't know whether I believe in god. I think I like to because it's comforting and convenient. It makes it a helluva lot easier to put it all onto someone *named* god for me I guess. But all I'll say is thanks to god. Thanks for saving those who did survive. Thanks for shaking us up. Although I really don't think this attack was the way to do it. Thanks for making us trying to shake off our *chalta hai* attitude. Let's hope we don't forget.

I remember watching the India England match that night, with my Dad. We watched the match, not sure if saw it fully-given it was a Day Night Match, switched off the TV without bothering to see the news one last time-something we usually did. Only next morning did I see the Newspaper Headlines-a glance really, before I headed for school.

I never realized how significant 26/11 would become.

In school the next morning, we were discussing the news in our Sociology Class. One of my friends, Smriti, said something about an attack in Mumbai. In India we've kinda gotten used to random blasts in our major cities-I figured it'd be something similar to what happened before. After all my family and I had narrowly missed attacks in Delhi at 2 places on the same day back in October 2005.

When I walked back from my bus to my home, I saw my mother standing, waiting for me. Something she never did. She told me about all that had happened and how serious it all actually was. One of our relatives was trapped in the Trident but had reached home safe. Thank god (?)

I remember being glued to the Television all day and night. It was traumatizing just watching it! To actually be there... the magnitude of which seemed impossible for me to figure out.

My parents didn't want me watching the news at all, fearing it may have a deep psychological impact on me. But then, human nature is one that is curious beyond limits.

This feeling-one where you'd think "Oh well, it looks like it's all gonna end by this hour, so that's good"-I think is safe to say, was felt by most (at least ones watching it unfold on the television!)

Except, it seemed never ending!

Stories of heroism spread. From the Chai Walah near CST, the Doctors, the Hotel Staff to the NSG Commandos. Our hearts warmed with those stories of courage and mettle.

Candle light vigils all over the country ensued. The public was angry. We wanted action. Our legendary *Chalta Hai* attitude looked like it was reaching it's demise. The BigB created headlines when on his blog he said he pulled out his licensed .32 revolver, loaded, under his pillow for a very disturbed sleep. The sight of Baby Moshe brought tears to our eyes. Stupid comments from Politicians only made us more furious. This guy-Ajmal Kasab-became the most talked about individual. Today he is also, more secure perhaps-with about Rs. 31 Crores spent to keep him alive, compared to normal Indians.But this event [calling it an event seems to belittle the enormity of it all actually] made us proud of our Defense Forces-the Police, the NSG...

Today, it has ended. It's been a year since it is over. But where are we?

PS-I used a picture of the Taj Mahal Hotel in Mumbai in it's glory. That's the memory I'd rather live with.